knife skills or lack of

i have no knife skills, you know the ability to chop, dice, mince food items in a relatively quick fashion, yet have everything relatively the same size. i cut with a steak knife. i do not own a real knife folks. i am too po to buy myself a forty dollar blade. every holiday that pertains to me, mother's day, birthday and christmas ( in that order) i vocalize what they oughta do, but oh no, i end up instead with something like lunch at olive garden followed by a mind boggling visit to ripley's. oh yay! i liked that too, i guess. folks, i want to be a quasi-serious cook here. i need a knife. have you ever try cutting a watermelon with a steak knife? or carve a pumpkin? it ain't pretty. i have entered the contests over at that oklahoma prairie woman's website, but i never win squat. any chefs out there upgrading, think of me and take pity. send me your old knife. i'm begging ya, ya'll.